10 ways to challenge normalised misogyny in the classroom

Misogyny in schools rarely begins with extreme incidents. More often, it shows up as a comment played for laughs. A pattern where male students treat female staff in ways they wouldn’t with male colleagues. A social media term dropped into conversation that staff don’t quite recognise.

Over time, if these moments go unchallenged - or inconsistently challenged - they become normalised.

For teachers, pastoral teams, and school leaders, the question isn’t simply: how do we punish misogyny? It’s: How do we interrupt a culture that allows it to feel ordinary? And for parents, it’s: How do we reinforce the same messages at home?

Having worked with over 60,000 young people through workshops and assemblies, we at Voicebox have seen that change which actually lasts doesn’t come from one-off reactions. It instead comes from consistent, strengths-based responses (more on that below) and a shared belief that boys are capable of something better.

1. Consistency over severity

When addressing misogynistic language or behaviour, consistency is far more powerful than severity.

A harsh punishment delivered once, but followed by silence the next five times, sends a confusing message. In contrast, a calm, clear boundary every single time communicates: This isn’t who we are here.

Misogyny becomes normalised when:

• Students believe nothing will happen if it’s reported (including those on the receiving end).
  

• Staff respond differently depending on mood, workload, or perceived “seriousness.”
  

• Humour is used to soften or deflect the behaviour.

  
  

Consistency doesn’t require confrontation every time, but it does require acknowledgement. Even a simple: “That comment doesn’t align with our values here" signals that the behaviour has been seen and named.

At Voicebox, we emphasise in our workshops and assemblies, as well as our staff training, that culture is built in micro-moments. The everyday interactions often matter more than the exceptional ones.

2. Misogyny as performance

One of the most important shifts for adults working with young people is understanding that misogynistic comments are often performative.

They are not always a direct response to girls themselves. Instead, they are frequently about:

• Peer approval
  

• Status
  

• Belonging
  

• Avoiding vulnerability

In many cases, the audience is other boys. When each performance is rewarded with laughs, it reinforces the need to perform, up-keeping the cycle of normalised misogyny as a result.

Humour is a key factor here. A sexist joke can function as a shortcut to status: quick laugh, quick validation. Challenging it publicly can feel, to the student, like a threat to that status, especially if shame is involved.

If teachers challenge a sexist comment with: “You’re a bad person for saying that", we risk reinforcing the performance. Defensiveness increases, the student doubles down, and the classroom becomes more of a stage.

Instead, separating the behaviour from the individual, identifying it as a performance rather than a representation of who they are, is key.

3. Taking a strengths-based approach

A strengths-based approach assumes that:

• The student is capable of making a better choice.
  

• The behaviour is learned and not fixed.
  

• Growth/change is possible.
  

This doesn’t mean lowering boundaries, but rather, holding them without shaming. For example, instead of “That’s sexist", try:

Or:

This reframes the issue around impact and belonging, rather than accusation. When we shame publicly, we increase the likelihood of:

• Deflection/ defensiveness
  

• Escalation
  

• A competition for status

When we address it calmly and consistently, we reduce the reward.

Through our Voicebox workshops, we’ve seen that when boys feel respected, even while being challenged, they are far more likely to reflect honestly on their behaviour.

4. The reporting gap: why girls don't bother

A significant barrier to addressing normalised misogyny is underreporting from those on the receiving end. Many girls have been socialised to:

• Avoid “making a fuss”
  

• Stay quiet to maintain ease
  

• Question whether something is “serious enough”
  

• Blame themselves

This is especially true in a society where only around 3.5% of rape and sexual assault police reports receive further action, with only 5% of those cases resulting in a charge.

At the same time, many boys are socialised away from emotional literacy and towards dominance as a marker of status.

If girls believe nothing will change, they won’t report. If boys see no consistent consequences, the culture persists. So the question for schools becomes:

What visible evidence is there that reporting leads to action?

That action doesn’t always need to be punitive, but it must be tangible: Follow-up conversations, restorative meetings and clear communication that the issue was taken seriously.

5. Restoration over punishment

Particularly with repeat offenders - or influential boys with social power - there is often space for restorative conversation which can:

• Explore the impact of words
  

• Challenge the “performance” narrative
  

• Build both empathy and a sense of respect

It also gives adults an opportunity to explore the deeper “why” behind the behaviour. You can ask questions like:

Punishment alone may remove the behaviour temporarily, but it also massively risks defensiveness and repeat offenders. Restoration has the potential to transform it.

That said, restoration is not softness. Boundaries should remain clear and consequences consistent. But the tone shifts from “You’ve failed" to “You’re capable of better, and we expect it.”

6. Staying fluent in the language of online worlds

Much of the misogyny showing up in classrooms today isn’t invented there - it’s imported.

Young people are absorbing messages about gender, power and relationships from influencers, podcasts, memes, gaming communities and online subcultures. Language linked to the manosphere, incel ideology, “alpha male” narratives, and dating dynamics can quickly filter into everyday school interactions, often disguised as humour or irony.

If staff aren’t familiar with the terminology circulating on platforms like TikTok, Instagram or YouTube, harmful narratives can pass them by as harmless slang.

You don't need to monitor every trend, but having enough fluency in online worlds can help recognise when language signals something deeper.

To support this, Voicebox has created a free downloadable glossary of Gen Z and Gen Alpha terms linked to relationships, the manosphere and incel culture. It’s designed to help staff and parents understand the context behind the words.

Without this awareness, responses risk being delayed or misdirected. With it, schools are better positioned to respond early, before online narratives become cemented in classroom culture.

7. Supporting teachers who are targets

Sometimes misogyny is directed at female staff. It's a pain point we hear from schools all too often. This can be particularly isolating for the staff experiencing it, especially if it’s framed as humour or subtle disrespect.

A strengths-based approach towards students should not mean minimising the experience of staff.

In these cases, the response to misogynistic behaviour should be done as a collective, so that the onus is not solely on the staff receiving it. This could look like:

• Leadership visibly backing the teacher
  

• Clear reaffirmation of staff authority
  

• Pastoral support if needed

Culture is not the responsibility of one individual teacher. It’s shaped by the entire staff body acting as a unit of care. And when students see staff supporting one another consistently, it reinforces the boundary.

8. A positive vision for boys

In order to address misogyny in a way that is long lasting and sustainable, schools can't just be putting measures in place to stop or punish negative behaviour. They should also be building positive and aspirational identities for their boys. Think about:

What does it mean to be a boy in your school?

Consider creating a shared vision such as:

• In this school, boys advocate for women.
  

• In this school, respect is strength.
  

• In this school, leadership includes listening.

In our Voicebox workshops and assemblies, we often ask boys:

When framed aspirationally, the conversation moves beyond compliance and into character. 

It's very rare a young person will say that they want to cause harm. Often it takes just one moment of a young person reflecting on what sort of person/friend/classmate/son they want to be in the world which can be the turning point for behaviour.

9. Reframing language

While terms like “sexist” or “misogynistic” are accurate, they often shut down dialogue in the moment (it's why we at Voicebox replaced the term "toxic masculinity" with "healthy masculinity").

Describing impact instead can be much more effective:

This keeps the focus on:

• The people affected
  

• The culture being built
  

• The shared values of the school

It also reduces the risk of immediate defensiveness.

10. The bigger picture: cultural, not individual

One of the most important reminders for staff and parents alike should be that this isn’t about “bad boys", it’s about cultural messages.

Young people are absorbing narratives about power, gender, relationships, status and masculinity from social media, peer groups and sometimes adults themselves.

By separating the individual from the behaviour, we can hold clear boundaries, avoid labelling, and create space for genuinely lasting change.

When students feel permanently judged, they will lean into the identity they’ve been given. When they feel capable of growth, many rise to meet that expectation. It links to the basic theory of positive affirmations i.e. saying kind things to yourself out loud can reinforce the message so much so that your brain will start to believe it.

The power of you and the power of us

There are two levels to challenging normalised misogyny in the schools.

The power of you

Every individual teacher has influence in micro-moments by:

• Naming behaviour consistently
  

• Challenging without shaming
  

• Modelling respect

Small interventions disrupt normalisation. Just as micro-moments built the culture of normalised misogyny, micro-moments can rebuild a new and healthier culture of respect.

The power of us

Whole-school alignment multiplies impact by:

• Agreed language for addressing incidents
  

• Shared values communicated in assemblies and via school displays
  

• Leadership visibly backing staff
  

• Pastoral and restorative systems in place for dealing with reported students

At Voicebox, our work with over 60,000 young people has shown that when schools take a collective stance, culture shifts more quickly and sustainably.

Just remember that the goal isn’t to create a culture of fear around saying the wrong thing. It’s more about consistency with boundaries, communication about respect and a whole-school approach to positive values and change.

This starts with the everyday choices we make in classrooms, corridors and conversations.

Culture is built in the moments we decide what we will - and won’t - let pass.

Find out more about Voicebox's work or get in touch directly.