How to take back control of your feed - tips for boys and young men
Is your feed showing you the same kind of video over and over?
It's not an accident. Social media is built to keep you scrolling. Some of what it pushes at boys and young men is designed to get views, not to tell the truth. This can affect how you see yourself and the world.
In this short guide, Voicebox and FlippGen explain why you see what you see, how to spot red flags, and how to take back control of your feed.
Why does this matter?
Over half of boys and young men see content online that can be harmful to them and those around them without meaning to. A lot of this content is designed to feel useful and encouraging. For example, a gym workout or diet for looking a certain way, finance advice on how to get rich quick, or dating tips.
However, there can be some subtle and not-so-subtle messages disguised in this content, messages telling you “how to be a man”, and what women should/shouldn’t be in relation to men.
Because the content is designed to feel helpful and practical, it might leave you feeling that these messages are fair, that you need to share them, or that you need to change something about yourself to be better.
It’s important to remember that you are not the problem for feeling this way. The content you see online, and the systems designed to push this, are to blame. You have the power to take back control of your feed, and you shouldn’t feel ashamed about asking for advice!
Why does my feed keep showing me this?
Social media platforms take notice of everything you click on, watch, and share. This data feeds your personal algorithm, which is perfectly designed to capture your attention and keep you scrolling for longer! Algorithms prioritise content that gets the most engagement, so posts that attract a lot of views are more likely to be shown on your feed.
Because of this, a lot of influencers post content designed to get a strong reaction. Sometimes, they don’t even agree with what they’re sharing.
Harrison Sullivan (aka @HSTikkyTokky) openly admitted he disagreed with some of the values he promoted on his social media on Louis Theroux’s Netflix documentary earlier this year, but still promotes them in order to get views.
When content creators upload controversial content, viewers get upset, angry or shocked, and interact with it. This tells the algorithm that these posts are interesting, and pushes them to a wider audience like yourself.
Am I in a ‘filter bubble’?
Sometimes, platforms only show you the same type of posts over and over, thinking you don’t want to see anyone else. If this happens, you’re in a ‘filter bubble’.
Over time, you might see fewer different viewpoints, making it easy to think that everyone thinks in this particular way. Really, the platform is just showing you a tiny part of the internet!
This can make it seem like extreme opinions are more common than they really are – but remember, you don’t have to agree with them, and you can take back control of your feed!
How to spot red flags
Not all content aimed at boys and young men is harmful, but some is built to manipulate you.
Watch out for content that:
Targets your insecurities by making you feel you're not "man enough" or good enough
Pushes comparison with unrealistic standards of looks, money, status or success
Mocks vulnerability by treating feelings, asking for help, or "feminine" traits as negative
Puts down women or blames them for men's problems
Generalises about women with statements like “all women/girls think X” (this type of language encourages us to stop thinking of people as individuals; it makes us assume stereotypes are true of everyone)
Offers a quick fix, like a paid course or "secret" that promises to solve everything
If a video leaves you feeling worse about yourself or angry at others, that's a sign to stop and ask why it was made. Use the questions in the next section to check.
How can I think critically about what I see?
Critical thinking is an important skill when you spend time online. It means looking carefully at content you see and taking time to think whether it is true. It helps you to stay one step ahead of creators trying to get views for the sake of it.
These are questions you can ask yourself to think more critically:
Who posted it? – is the information from a real website, news source, or someone you trust?
Is there proof? – does the post have facts, pictures or links that prove the information? Real info normally has evidence!
Do others say the same? – real information should be reported from more than one trusted website – if it’s only coming from one place, it might be wrong!
Why is it there? – is the information supposed to inform you, entertain you or sell you something? Be careful if it makes you scared or angry, and think about why you might be seeing it.
Should I share this? – Before you share something, ask ‘Who made it? Are they trying to sell me something or trick me? Is it real? Does it make sense? When was it made? How does it make me feel?’
How can I control my feed?
Follow different creators – follow people with different views so you don’t get stuck in an ‘echo chamber’ – it’s important to understand the diverse world around you!
Question what you’re seeing online – practice your critical thinking skills.
Search broadly – don’t just get your information from one place, look for different sources and don’t just rely on the first creator you come across.
Talk to different people offline – speak to people face-to-face in real life, you might hear a viewpoint you’ve never considered before.
Be aware of algorithms – think about why you are seeing certain posts and take notice if you are seeing the same opinions over and over. Is it time to take a break from scrolling?
YOU have a say in what you see online
Helpful content leaves you feeling better, not worse. It should feel real, honest, and not like you’re trying to be “sold” a product or an idea.
You can help make that kind of content more common.
Follow creators who do it well. Share this post with a mate or classmate. Talk to someone you trust, like a parent or teacher, about what you see online.
At Voicebox and FlippGen, we believe young people like you deserve spaces to be themselves without pressure, both online and in the real world.
You have more power over your feed, and the conversation, than you think.
Written by Frankie at FlippGen and Annie at Voicebox
Sources:
Vodafone: https://www.vodafone.co.uk/newscentre/press-release/ai-aggro-rithmsThe Children’s Society: https://www.childrenssociety.org.uk/what-we-do/blogs/protecting-children-from-misogyny-manosphere
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